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I never got the big deal with the beach. The water is gross, there’s nothing to play with, and the waves are so loud that you can’t hear anything.

Mom loves it, so of course we got dragged off to work on her tan the first weekend of summer. At least they had wifi on the road, so I got to spend all morning on my phone until we got there. Then, dad had to drop off the trailer, because it won’t go on sand, and I wanted to stay at the campsite, where they at least got 3G. Can’t expect too much from a cheap ass RV park, but it’s better then nothing!

“Come on,” mom told me to “Put your swimsuit on, it’ll be fun.”

I just sulked, and changed in the trailer, but she wasn’t going to take no for an answer. Like she has to drag us all down here to work on her tan, as if they don’t have the sun back home.

I guess I was in a mood, but my brother finally told me what the “Long walks on the beach” are all about.

“Let me show you.” He got out his phone, and brought up dating aps. “See?” A lot of them said Likes: Long Walks on the Beach.”

“That doesn’t explain anything,” but then we ran out of service so we had to plug them in to charge for later, and get out.

“Now, Laila.” Dad called me over when we got out. “I don’t want you ruining the whole vacation with your sourpuss.” I just pouted, but Cassius laughed. “And you.” Dad pointed, “Grab the cooler, and help me out.” So, they got the tailgate down to unload it, and mom lay out the blankets to suntan on.

I just kicked the sand, it was hot, and dry. “Race you to the water!” Cassius dropped the cooler, and ran off, throwing his shirt away, and jumping over a wave when he got there.

“YOU WIN!” I yelled back, and just kicked around the sand in my sandals. It got hot, and I got sunburnt. So, mom had to put the other lotion on my back, and I rubbed it in my arms, but then I spent the rest of the day in the truck.

Bored, and miserable, since my phone still didn’t work. I got to sleep in the back seat, while Cassy set up a tent to camp out for real. So, I lay down to take a nap until Cassy came back to talk to me.

“Where’s mom, and dad?” I sat up.

“They went for a walk, so they’re gonna be gone for a while.” Since it was just the 2 of us, he finally told me what that’s all about. “It’s like a code for sex. When a lady puts that on her dating profile, it’s like saying if you take me out for a long walk on the beach, then I’ll put out when we get there.”

“Ew gross.” He still had the dating apps up on his phone, and it remembered all the ladies he looked up to show me on the way down.

“What about her?” He showed me, “You think she’d go out with a boy like me?”

I giggled, shaking my head.


“A little boy like you.”

“Who you calling little?”

“No, I don’t think a bikini model would go out with a boy your age. You’re not even in middle school, let alone in high school.”

“So what? I’ll be in middle school next year.” Like that makes any difference, when I just said she wouldn’t go out with a middle schooler, either. So, he took his phone off alone, and I bet I knew what he was doing. Looking at all those women in their swimsuits, but I was still at that stage where everything was gross. Not just sex, but that was expecially gross.

Of course, I knew the basics of what goes where, but you know those parts are for peeing, and then you start rubbing them together. Until she gets moist, and the whole thing just grossed me out for years, and years.

All though, once he left me alone, I started thinking about mom expecially. She’s white, so she has to work on her tan, and you’d think that being mixed I wouldn’t get freckles, or sunburnt, but she doesn’t freckle. She tans, and we had to drive all the way out here just so she could untie her top, and get her back without leaving any lines from the strings, or the bow.

That left dad to sit down beside her, and rub the suntan lotion all over her back. She really looks fine with a deep tan, and she even goes to the spa back home to lie down in a machine, like a panini to get it.

Which sounds boring, and yet again I’m stuck out here all by myself. My phone won’t work, and I didn’t think to save any pages before we left the reception like Cassius. (Yes, my dad is into Boxing. So I’m named after Laila Ali, and 3 guesses who Cassius is named after.)

“Huh!” So I went back to Emails, and brought up the one I saved for no reason. Other then I threatened to call the FBI if he didn’t leave me alone, but he sent pictures. That’s what I threatened to call the FBI for, he’s a grown man sending dirty pictures to gross me out, but I was starting to feel something inside.

Something new, that wasn’t gross, and just the first picture with his pants buttoned up. He kind of told a story so you could scroll down, and stop when it got to be too much. Then he had the zipper halfway down. The button sticking out one side, and a big bulge in his underwear. Then, the next one he pulled them down, and then the next one he had his hand around it.

His dick, there dick pics, my only collection of dick pics to date, and I don’t even know how he got my email in the first place. He didn’t send a reply back after I threatened to forward it to the FBI. (If I knew how to get ahold of the FBI email, but I lied, and said my uncle was in the FBI.)

Maybe he just sent them randomly as spam, but I never really went so far before. There sure is a lot of them, but after the one of him holding it around the bottom. The next one he was holding it at the top.

So, I could go back and forth, switching between those 2 pictures which my phone saved automatically, and watching his hand move up and down his big hard dick. “Uh! You want to touch me, yeah.” I slipped my swimsuit off my shoulder, and popped my nipple out to touch it. Rub it around, and round with my fingertip, “Touch me here.”


“Uh!” I covered it up, and turned away from the door. I left open, because if you closed the truck up all the way, it just got hot in there.

“It’s okay, I’m not looking, but it’s good.”

“No it’s not.” I finally got my swimsuit back up over my shoulder, and the burn lines. The freckles, and the pale stripe where it didn’t hurt to have the tight fabric stretched over it.

“I mean, it’s okay. Lots of girls do it, even though they don’t want to admit it, but.” He picked up my phone. “Who’s this guy you’re looking at?”

“I don’t know, just some rando guy. Like the bikini girls on your dating app, and what’s with you using all those dating apps when they’re never going to get you a date?”

“Not never, I got to talk to this 1 lady, until she wanted to cam with me.”

“Really.” I looked him up and down. “With you?”

“Well, ha.” He laughed, and rubbed his own head. “Not actually me, you see I used dad’s profile pic, so she thought that I was him.”

“What’s dad got a dating profile for, and does mom know about it?”

“No, like I said it’s my profile. I made it, but since you have to be 18, I used dad’s credit card, and photos.”

“Oh, and dad didn’t notice the charges on his credit card?”

“No, no charges. It’s just a free trial, but that’s why I use so many. When the free trial is up, you have to cancel it, but there’s always a hundred more you can join. Look.” He showed me, all the aps, and there’s a lot of them. “Mom doesn’t know, but don’t tell her.”

“If dad finds out he’ll beat your ass!”

“Well, you’re not going to tell him either.”

“Why not? You think.”

“Because he’d be just as pissed at you if he found your dirty dick pics on the phone.” So, before mom, and dad got back from sex on the beach (Oh yeah. You bet that’s what they walked off to do, after he got hard buttering her up on the towel. They just didn’t want to do it in front of us.) We agreed, I won’t tell on him for using dating aps to talk to full grown women, impersonating dad, and he won’t tell on me for saving that Email full of pics of a fat pervert man jerking off.

Oh yeah, after we got back to the campsite, I got to look at the whole thing, and the last photos were of him busting a nut. All over his belly, and standing up, so it hung down dripping in front of his balls. His gross hairy balls, and even though it was gross, at the same time, it quickly became my favorite picture of him. I don’t know why, or what changed. It still was so very nasty, and even grosser than gross. The grossest thing I wanted to think about, but I did find myself thinking about it, a lot.

He’s white, all white, and circumcised. A little fat, not like huge bloated fat, but he’s got a bit of a gut, and shouldn’t that be a turnoff, too? IDK what his face looks like, he wouldn’t show me it, but I imagined a neckbeard, and a bald spot. He’s not even attractive, and I even tried to make him even more unattractive in my head, so I’d stop thinking about him at a bad time.

The worst time was on the way back to the campgrounds. Because then all 4 of us was crammed into the cab of the pickup, and I remembered what we said about getting each other in trouble, and not getting each other in trouble. Mom was humming to herself, and after she finished wringing her hair out she just played with it.

White girl hair, and that’s another thing, I don’t think she really understands. I taught her how to box braid it, and my auntie Sherique helped her out with the back where I can’t see, but I don’t think she really gets what all that nasty ass water would do to my hair if I got in it. With all the salt, and fish crap, and nasty ass stuff like that.

But she was satisfied, obviously. She got what she wanted, her long walk on the beach, so she and dad could fuck. I don’t know, it still seems like a lot of trouble to go through. Load up the trailer, and drive all the way out to the coast. Pay 60 bucks a night to park it at the campground, set up the cooler, and stuff.

All that just to fuck, when they can fuck at home, pretty much any time they like? I just don’t get it.


So then I had to go in the trailer to shower, and change to get ready for bed. I mean, the back seat of the truck, but that’s all right. I liked it cause I can plug in my phone, and get caught up with my friends. Though I didn’t say anything about cutting a deal with my brother. What’s the point of a I won’t tell if you don’t tell deal if you go an break it, blabbing to all your friends that he caught you playing with yourself.

Okay, my titty, 1 titty, and I barely even got started on the nipple before I got interrupted. So, I signed off, and sent [GN] to my friends.



[Good Night. Sleep Tight. Don’t let the Bed Bugs Bite?]

[LOL so crazy.]

Finally, I signed off, and lay down to sleep, but I couldn’t. As soon as I closed my eyes, it was like I had that picture of drippy dick printed on my eyelids. “Uh!” So, I got up, and got my phone out from between the seats again. Fully charged, so I could unplug it, and sit back to find porn on the internet.

Not hard, it turns out all you have to do is type in [White girl playing with herself] to get a link to Xvideos, of a white girl playing with herself.

It’s not a gay thing, I just decided on white because you can see everything better. I guess, the one I found was really pale instead of tanned, so you could see her cheeks get really red. I picked Vanessa, because she was kinda dressed like me, I guess. In the thumbnail, she had on an old baggy undershirt, and cutoff shorts.

She teased the boy she was camming with a while, and they didn’t show him, but I could imagine. I still had all them dick pics fresh in my head from that afternoon, so all I had to do was close my eyes. I couldn’t get rid of them if I tried, that was the point, but finally she got up, and took her top off.

Leaned over to type something in the keyboard, and then she wiggled her hips out of the tight shorts. Turned the webcam down so she could sit back, put her legs up, and her hands down her underpants. Really nice ones, with teddy bears all over it, and beach balls. I guess it’s supposed to look like the teddy bears are throwing the beach balls back and forth, but they’re turned all different ways like those ones in the Grateful Dead poster.

There is this 1 boy back home, a hippy boy my brother smokes with sometimes, and I thought he was interested in me, because he invited me over, but he just kicked me outta the garage so they could smoke weed, and look at the hippy trippy posters under the black light. So, I guess he don’t jack off, or get laid out in the garage, because if he did, I’d see the spots light up from his dick dripping when he got up, and “How the fuck do they do this?”

I got up to take my shorts off, but even bent over as far as I can go, I can barely see over my pubic hair, and the white girl on the webcam. She got her panties off, and her fingers went to work, but you could see everything before she covered herself up with her fingers. So, I stopped it, and switched to camera. It was dark in there, so even with the screen shining between my legs, I barely got a better look at what I had to work with, which isn’t much.

You know what’s weird? Besides the freckles, especially on my shoulders, because my mom don’t freckle, she tans so I got to wonder where I got that from, but I hate it. “Huh!” It kinda itches, and aches, but I tried to put my legs up like that white girl at the computer, and I like this new truck.

I ain’t ADD, but I’m having trouble concentrating on this, because it’s nasty. Gross, and I can even smell it which ain’t helping. My puss. “Sour puss.” My daddy is black, but he wasn’t raised inner city. He grew up in a foster home, way out in the country. His parents were white, and baptist, and couldn’t have kids of there own, so they adopted.

Ask Aunt Sherry why they kept adopting black kids. Some kinda baptist ministry thing. We ain’t baptist, or any other kinda Christian, so what’s the problem, Laila? Why you such a frigid prude about this stuff, so you think about trucks, and aunt Sherry at a time like this, when just a few hours ago, you couldn’t stop thinking about the D. The 1 D I ever got a real good look at, even in pictures?

“What’s wrong with you? UH!” I jumped, and covered up again when Cassy knocked on the back window. “CASSY!” I yelled, and waved him off, but I was sitting on my blanket, so all I could do was pull my shirt back down over my titties. He jumped down, and came around to the back door.

“You better not be taking pictures.” He put his hands up to yell through the glass.

“Quit yelling!” I finally let him in before he woke the whole campground up, “What’s wrong with you?”

“I couldn’t sleep either, but like I said. You can’t send nudes like that.”

“I know? I wasn’t, I just didn’t have any mirror to look at, and see what I was doing.”

“Oh,” he didn’t have to ask, since it was obvious. “That’s good.”

“No it’s not, and why you keep saying that when you know it isn’t?”

“Well what’s wrong with it?”

“It’s gross, and nasty. I don’t even know what to do, and I can’t even figure it out without wanting to puke all over the place, and then what?”

“Well, that’s a turn-off.”

“No? That’s the problem, I don’t know how to turn it back off again. You boys are lucky, since they show you all the time in the school yard.”

“What are you talking? They don’t show you how to beat off in the school yard?”

“Yeah?” I pumped my fist, “As if I don’t know what that means, we’re not stupid.”

“Oh, well.” He scratched his head, and picked at a curl on the back. “So, what you’re saying is you want to play with yourself, but you don’t know how, and that’s why you looked up white girls, to see how the white girls do it?”

“No?” How long was he back there watching me through the back window? “It’s so you can see what she’s doing better.”

“Because white girls shave between their legs.”

“No? Well, yeah some do, but some black, and latina girls do too.”

“So, what’s the problem?”

“I don’t know! That’s the problem, I never even been turned on before, and I don’t know how to turn it off, and I can’t sleep, and I’m sorry I kept you up,” I feel like I’m about to cry.

“Well, maybe I can help you?”

“What can you do to help?”

“Well, you know. Maybe I could help you figure it out.” He even giggled, and shook his head. “Or finger it out, as the case may be.”

“Really?” I know, he’s my brother, and not like my dad, and aunt Sherry are only brother and sister because they got adopted by the same family, but I didn’t think of that. The word incest, even though I knew it, and what it ment. I let my brother touch me, and pulled up my shirt so he could play with my titties bare handed. Kicked the blanket off to put my legs up, and he even went down to lick me out real good.

“Oh, so good! Yeah right there, yeah yeah yeah. Just keep doing it right there like that oh OH!” It felt a little weird, but everything about this was weird, and getting my fingers in it. Touching it, and smelling it come out. It’s not a turn-off, any more. God I wish it was, so I can just turn over and go to sleep, but I can’t. It was driving me nuts, and he wanted to stick his tongue in there to get me off?

Ew, gross, it’s so nasty, but it felt good. “Oh!” so good. “Oh oh IthinkI’mgonna uh ah ahn NGH! NHHHHHHHHHN!” I just clamped his head in my legs, and rode it out. Until I could breathe, and let go.

“Huh, fuck, you liked to rip my head off!”

“Huh, I’m sorry, but I really appreciate you doing it, and um.” I bit my lip, and shook my head.


“You think, it might be okay if I tried sucking your dick?” Honestly, just out of curiosity, but also in appreciation for eating me out like that.

“Haha, what are you kidding? Yeah, let me get it out real quick. Huh, I thought you’re gay.”

“No, what? No, not even, ugh!” I can’t imagine, even bringing myself to do. That, it’s just too nasty. I can barely even bring myself to touch in there with my fingers, but I guess that’s why he went for oral sex instead of trying to fuck me. Since he caught me looking at white girls naked, I guess that’s an understandable mistake, but we rectified that right away, and yeah it was little.

Yeah, it was even a little gross when he pulled out to finish off by hand, but I just caught my breath, and watched it. “Huh!” It even smelled nasty, like I knew it would, but at the same time, I couldn’t take my eyes off it. I felt hypnotized or something until he finally stopped, and pulled his pants back up. Pajama pants, since he was camping out in a tent, he couldn’t just walk around in his underwear, like he does at home, but as soon as he left.

I lay down, and fell asleep. Pretty much as soon as my head hit the pillow with the fresh smells of sex in every breath. So, I guess I got used to it, but if it weren’t for my brother being so understanding, I don’t know how I’d ever gotten the chance.

I know I’m not the best looking girl ever, but he doesn’t mind that. He’s my brother, so he loves me, and cares about me anyway. I’m just so happy that he’s willing to do something so nasty, to help me go to sleep.

So, I blew him, and it wasn’t even half as bad as I expected it to be. He didn’t even make a stupid joke about it not being sour after all…

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