Am I a boy or a girl?

A trans girl questions his/her decision.

I have posted my picture below. This is what happens when you decide that you are a girl, even though you were born as a boy and you let them cut your balls off. I still have a cock but it just hangs there, limp. It’s no good for anything but pissing. I can’t fuck anyone. I can’t even get a blowjob. It will never get hard. I don’t have a cunt for guys to fuck. The few guys that will date me only want to fuck my face or asshole while they make fun of me. All I can do with a girl is to eat her pussy till she comes all over my face as she makes fun of me. I’m a boy. I want my balls back, but that can’t happen.

It started when I was about four. I liked dressing up in my mother’s clothes and wearing her jewelry. She thought it was cute. She bought me dolls. Dad was gone. He was not there to play catch, take me fishing or do any other guy things.

I watched my mother being fucked by many guys. She did not mind that I watched. She was really enjoying it. She loved being a woman and being a slut.

I was kind of small and skinny. I was not encouraged to play sports, so I did not build up my body. When I started school, Mom still bought me kind of feminine looking guy clothes. I spent more time with the girls than the guys. They did things that I thought were more fun. People started making fun of me. They called me a girly boy and I started thinking about myself as a girl.

When I was about ten, Mom took me to see a shrink. She, the shrink decided that I was a girl stuck in a boy’s body. She prescribed puberty blockers. They worked. I stayed like a little kid, not growing into a young man. I thought of myself as a girl. Most people treated me like a girl.

A few months after my eleventh birthday, I asked Mom to buy me some dresses. I started wearing the dresses, heels and make-up. My Mom, my doctor and my female teachers treated me like a girl. They even gave me a girl name. They called me Eva. I liked that. The puberty blockers kept me from getting an erection. I hated having a cock. I wanted a pussy like the other girls.

I never got a cunt but I did allow them to talk me into getting castrated. They said that I would then be able to stop talking the medicines said and wouldn’t get urges to pretend I was a boy. They asked me if I wanted to get breast implants. I said that I would like that, but not till I was a little older and the other girls got their boobies, too.

When I was thirteen, three older guys said they wanted to be my friends. I went to one of their houses to play video games with them, but they raped me. They stripped me, put me on my hands and knees and pushed their hard cocks in my mouth and ass. Each of them came in each of my holes. They especially enjoyed fucking my mouth after they had been fucking my ass. They slapped my hanging cock, over and over, while saying that they should cut it off. After they were done with me, they thru my dress at me and told me to get out of the house, till they told me to come back again so they could fuck my fag body again.

At fifteen, I started feeling like I had made the wrong choice, but so many people who were important in my life, had assured me that I had made the right choice. For some people it might have been the right choice, but I decided that it was the wrong choice for me.

Now I’m seventeen. I still wear dresses. I still suck cocks, have my ass fucked and eat pussy but there is not much pleasure in it for me. This is my life and I have to live it. Next week I get my boobs.

If you are thinking that you are the wrong sex for your body, think long and hard about what it would be like changing it. Study what people say is both good and bad about it. It may be right for you or you may regret it. I usually do.

I am going on a date with a thirty year old man that I have been with before. He’s a big black man with a big long cock that squirts cum like a fountain. He loves filling both of my holes with his seed. Then he likes to put me in a tub or shower and piss all over me, especially in my mouth as I hold it wide open.

He has a timeshare condo in Lake Tahoe. We are going for a week and we will do some fun things in the town. I think I am looking forward to going with him. I’m confused. He treats me nice but has the sex drive of three guys. He says he will pay for my new tits. If I can’t be a guy again, I want big tits.

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823. If you want to read more of my stories, click on my user name at the top of this story. Any pictures with my stories are of people who are 18 or older and are from friends or a photo sharing site. Photo credit and thanks to imagefap.com.

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