Therapy and why it doesn’t help

After everything I said to him I still think he was right in some ways

I was raped as a boy of 11 and for 5 years I was used and abused by my cousin and his wife and their sick friends they were all peado fucks who made me do thing’s for them and to them.
Yeah I was young and sex wasn’t even a thing to me I’d never seen a girl naked but had seen a girl pee standing up with her pussy on full show and she said that I could watch her so I did.
I had gone on a summer break with my mother and little brother and back in the 70s we were lucky to be going away I’d met my cousin and his family once before and their daughter lizzy was my age and cheeky like me probably,not realising what was about to happen we got close went swimming in a brook and I saw her standing piss for the first time in my life,I’d noticed during watching her my cock had jolted and got harder and she’d seen it and encouraged me to show her my cock but I was shy but eventually I did.
She seemed to like it but had said make sure my dad doesn’t see it bobbing about or he’ll have you, confused I said nothing but instead I take off my pants and show her my cock in my hand now flicking it around lizzy asks can she touch it with her pussy still on show from her pee I immediately say yes and she reaches out and grasp my dick and rubbed my arse cheeks,this I found odd but felt nice to be honest. Lizzy seems to know what to do with it so I just stand letting her play with my 11 year old boy cock. I don’t cum but as time went by I felt uncomfortable so we stopped what we were doing and sheepishly agreed to say nothing to anyone else.
Later that night I stayed at their home and her dad and mum were sat watching TV with us both after our baths and yes we bathed together being family it didn’t seem to bother me or her,she had tiny bumps for tits but was a bit hairy and I had noticed earlier that her arse was very shapely for her age 13. Her mum decto go up to bed allowing us to stay up and finish watching the film with her dad. I hadn’t noticed at 1st but sat on the couch I noticed lizzy isn’t wearing knickers,her nightie had rode up and her teenage pussy was in full view and she saw me looking so opened up her legs slightly and put a finger underneath her arse and put it in her pussy 😉 my cock sprang up and her dad sat there oblivious to me and her,I watched as her fingers got wetter and she pushed her arse towards me and mouthed to me to touch her pussy,fuck yeah I did it felt natural to be there with my hand touching her and my dick in the air trying to get out of my pj’s, lizzy still playing with her fanny and me still nearly knuckles deep inside her WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON her dad shouts obviously seeing us on the couch now,we immediately separate but it’s too late for us,he gets up and comes over to us and said show me what you were doing, lizzy and I are very scared and we stutter a response to his request but he says show me what you were doing to each other, I’m frozen with fear as lizzy tells him we were just playing about and with that he tells lizzy to show him her pussy and tells her to do what she was doing to it,I just sat there still hard as fuck and she sheepishly agreed to his orders and opened her legs and revealed her gleaming pussy and stuck her finger in it right in front of her dad,I was so shocked and embarrassed to look at her but he then turns to me and tells me to touch her pussy,I look at lizzy she’s like a dear in headlights but let’s me know it’ll be fine if I do,I say nothing but I put a finger gingerly on her pussy and slightly finger her pussy she looked at me and smiled and seems to have opened her legs a bit wider to allow better access,whilst we are playing her dad then pulled down his pants and tells me to touch him so I’m fingering his daughter lizzy and now I’m reaching out to touch his cock and now lizzy is asking him can she touch it daddy,he mumbled something like yeah and she was happy to feel his balls as I rubbed up and down his cock,he was a bit fat but his cock was a bit big and firm in my hand he asks me have I ever sucked a cock before,I hadn’t even seen one till then so no idea what to do just go with it I thought.
Lizzy now sat forward and pulls him into her mouth licking the end up and down as she does,he tells me to take off my pj’s and I do so standing there naked with my pecker sticking up with my cousin and his daughter. I love this and lizzy now looking at me naked tells her dad she wants to suck my dick he says ok then. She tells me to lie down and I do but as she starts to wank me off instructing me to tickle her pussy as she takes my dick in her mouth I let out a gasp as she literally swallowing up my 11 year old boy cock and her dad is standing over me and he’s wanking off whilst she is sucking my dick not wanting to be left behind I reach up to her dads dick and start to stroke it and tug at it I’d never felt a cock before but I loved it and I don’t know what came over me but I actually asked him if I could suck it as his daughter did me I’d do him,I don’t know what came over me but I wanted to taste a cock in my mouth and then I was just sucking his big fat cock off and he seems to like it I look down at lizzy and she’s got a finger in her pussy and a cock in her mouth and is making me feel funny and all of a sudden I cum for the first time ever as I do lizzy laps at my cock and takes all my cum in her mouth. Her dad still with his cock in my mouth tells me to get on my knees and eat lizzys pussy as she lies legs apart on the couch I noticed she is wet with her love juices so I touch her pussy with my tongue and I love it so much I didn’t even realise her dad behind me pressing his cock head against my arse and gently it starts to enter into me reaching underneath me I grabbed him and slowly felt his dick go in bit by bit and he grabs my hips and fucks me from behind whilst I’m pussy deep in his daughter and she loves the way I’m doing it and now she’s cumin and I just lick and lick till she squirts onmy face omg, my very first experience with a girl was amazing and I’m still on my knees getting fucked by her dad and I didn’t even realise she was in on the whole thing apparently she was willing to help daddy get what he wanted and she got to play too. So it’s a win win either way..but as he came in my arse trying not to be too excited I actually pissed myself and came at the same time I collapse on the couch a few minutes later he goes off to bed without a word to anyone about it and lizzy and I cuddle up and fall asleep together ❤️

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