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A Beginner’s Guide To Cuckolding – From One Perspective

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This short essay is named as it is in the title for a reason: It’s kind of a guide…but only from one person’s perspective. That’s the point.

I’ve written many answers on forums on the Internet regarding being a cuckold and I often notice that they seem to be coming from people for whom the cuckold lifestyle is probably not for them. I’m no judge on the matter and nobody has to get permission from me to do exactly as they please, I’m just saying that they don’t seem to be asking the right questions.

Other questions are easy to answer, such as “My husband has been a cuckold for a while. I’m looking for new ways to humiliate him.” I can give examples of things my wife and I do, and just basically offer ideas. Take it or leave it. Simple.

If the first paragraph doesn’t make sense, here are two examples: One often-asked question is “How do I turn my husband into a cuckold?” and the other is “How do I get my wife to cuckold me?” I believe the askers of both of these particular questions are doomed for failure.

Dissecting the first question into its real self “How do I tell my unsuspecting husband I’m going to dominate him, fuck other men in front of him, and make him like it?” Does that sound like something that’s going to actually work in real life? It doesn’t to me. And the other question from that paragraph can be paraphrased “How do I get my wife, who took marriage vows with me and has kept them so far, to fuck other men while I watch them just because it’s my fantasy to do so?” Your wife is about to have you committed to an insane asylum, my friend, not fuck guys so you can watch.

So, how to be involved in the cuckold lifestyle then? It certainly happens and it certainly can be done. I can only tell you how I did it. Other cuckolds can tell you in the comments below “That’s not how we got started at all.” and that’s fine. That’s my whole point. Other cuckold couples can only tell you how they did it, not how you’re going to do it. Here’s how it got started, and progressed, with my wife and me:

One time there was a friend of my wife who used to come to our house on the weekend and we’d drink and hang out. The drinking got out of hand one time (as drinking is prone to do) and so did we. We ended up having a threesome. My wife realized that she was probably more bi than purely straight. This surprised her. We had threesomes with this same girl pretty often after that. Then, this girl had been talking to another friend, who also wanted to join in. My wife was all for it. So we did.

We were having threesomes or foursomes almost every single weekend. But it was always with female friends of my wife, never other guys. That went on for quite a while. Months. That’s how it all started, us having sex with people besides the person we married.

At one point, much later, my wife told me that she had been talking to this girl and found out that she and her husband kind of did what we did but it was more “wife swapping” than her husband having sex with her female friends. The girl told her they were interested in doing that with us. My wife asked me if I was interested in trying that. That led to a dilemma. I wasn’t particularly keen on the idea of some other guy plowing my wife. Yes, selfish as hell, I know. Since I had been having a great time for the last several months fucking her friends left and right, seemed like, I would have to be an intolerable asshole to tell her that she could not now have sex with another guy.

Maybe I’d be cool with it but maybe I’d freak out and kick them all out of my house as soon as I saw some guy dicking my wife. I had no idea. I thought I’d be cool with it, but I wasn’t positive. For those thinking about trying it for the first time, you had better realize that no matter what your fantasy is, this could very well be what happens. You may be cool, or you may flip your lid and freak out.

The couple arrived on the appointed night and we got to drinking some. The wife turned out to be way cuter than I had expected and the guy was a decent-looking dude. That wasn’t a requirement of any kind, that’s just how it turned out. It was a little awkward to me that soon this guy would be fucking my wife, but I was also getting pretty interested in fucking his. After a while, his wife eventually blurted out “Well, let’s get to it!” and laughed, so we did. Get to “it”, that is.

Namely, some guy sticking his dick in my wife. We were all naked on the same bed and I don’t remember whose dick went into whose wife first but his wife was a cutie so I was mostly just interested in sticking mine in her, at least at first. I was aware that the guy and my wife were getting busy but so was I and for a minute didn’t notice them much.

Then at one point, the wife wanted to get doggy style while I fucked her, which now gave me more time to kind of look around while also staying busy fucking. So, for the first time, I was watching my wife and the guy fucking. They were fucking missionary at that moment and the guy was really beating that pussy up hard. I was amazed. My wife was acting like it was the best cock she ever had and he was damn sure giving it to her. After a few seconds, I hadn’t even realized that I had stopped fucking this other girl but evidently, I had because she looked at me and then looked to see what I was looking at. She laughed and said “Pay attention” and that’s when I realized I wasn’t even fucking. So I started back again, but was having a hell of a hard time not watching my wife and this guy fuck.

It was incredible. He was really throwing the dick and she was loving it. Finally, everybody finished up and then small talk, more drinking, and then they left. After they did, I made what turned out to be a huge mistake. Not a mistake like putting your hand in a piece of dangerous machinery but a mistake in that I didn’t get to fuck any pussy whatsoever for quite a while after that.

What I said was, that I had had way more fun watching her fuck than I did actually fucking the other wife. She said “Really?” I said “Definitely.” Then my wife said she had noticed that I was watching them and that it turned her on to fuck with me watching her. She had seen me fuck her friends dozens of times and although it was completely fine, it didn’t particularly turn her on one way or the other to do so. I told her that wasn’t the case with me at all. Watching her was more fun than fucking. She laughed and said that in the future she’d have to see if she could arrange more of that, then.

Which she did. At first, she was kind of role-playing being dominant to me but later it turned into her actually being dominant. For example, a couple of weekends later she told me the girl and her husband wanted to hook up again and asked if I was interested. I told her I was, but mainly because I wanted to watch her fuck again. That Friday night, the guy showed up but without the wife. I was surprised but I didn’t care. This was when she first started experimenting with kind of being “play dominant”.

She told me to take off my clothes and kneel by the bed while I watched them fuck. I was thinking “Hell yeah”. While they fucked, my dick was hard as a rock and I started jerking off. She saw me and told me to stop. I did. I figured she wanted to fuck again after the guy left. Eventually, he came in her and after small talk again, like before, he left. The guy had gotten dressed, of course, but my wife was still naked and so was I.

She walked back into the bedroom and sat on the edge of the bed. I thought my cock was going to explode if I didn’t do something soon so I kind of pushed her backward onto the bed and started to get on top of her and fuck her for all she was worth. Probably for 5 seconds, anyway. However, she pushed me off and sat back up. I stood back up. I started to push her back again and she said “No. You can jerk off for me if you want to.” I thought “Fuck that” and started to push her back yet again. Again she refused and said, “I’ll let you jerk off for now but if you don’t, I won’t let you jerk off at all.” I thought to myself “The nerve!” but decided I’d defy her in another way.

She usually didn’t like it for me to cum on her so I thought to myself I’d stand in front of her and jerk off and shoot cum right on her, like it or not. That’d teach her who the boss really was. So I did. While I did in fact cum and some of it went on her legs and tits and stomach, none went on her face like I planned, but it was a victory, nonetheless. She didn’t flinch though. She told me to get a towel and wipe it off. I almost told her no but I relented and did it anyway.

The next night she told me to stand by the bed and watch her while she masturbated. I did and it turned out to be an almost exact repeat of what happened the night before. No pussy, jerk off, but you better do it when I say to. So I did.

In my mind, it was a little confusing, admittedly, that she cut me off from sex so easily (and I let her) and she had so smoothly and easily assumed this “bossy” role. I was kind of amazed, not in a good way, but my dick was getting hard every time I thought about it. I kind of wanted to put my foot down and tell her to fuck off with her “rules” but I kind of didn’t want her to stop. So I didn’t say anything. Naturally, to her, this was me “submitting to her authority” when in fact I was trying to decide if I was going to tolerate it or not.

Every time I tried to think about the pros and cons of what I was “submitting to” and almost decided I wasn’t going to tolerate it, my dick would get hard thinking about what she was doing. It was confusing.

After the first time she had sex with the guy and I watched, it was almost exactly two weeks later when she told me they were fucking again. My dick got hard as soon as she said it. Her newest “rule” was that I had to be nude the entire time the guy was at our house, which really meant I had to get my clothes off right before he got there because they immediately went straight to the bedroom when he did. This time after he left, she said “I’m going to take a shower.” then stopped and said “How long has it been since you got some pussy? About two weeks? Three?” I said I wasn’t counting. She laughed and told me to come to the bathroom with her. I did and when she bent over to turn on the faucet to the shower, she turned to me and said “Well?” and put her hands on the edge of the tub.

The thought crossed my mind to tell her I didn’t even want to fuck her but she was bent over and my dick was harder than any rock and the next thing I knew I was doing it, not saying whatever stupid shit I had been about to say. After about half a minute I knew I was going to bust my nut in her but she stood up, causing my dick to come out of her, and said “That’s enough. Jerk off for me.” I did and almost immediately came on her leg. She laughed and got in the shower, trying to portray that me fucking her was so inconsequential, she had barely noticed it.

The next morning, same thing. She was getting dressed and stopped, looked at me, pulled her jeans down a little, and bent over with her hands on the bed. I just looked at her, again thinking I was going to tell her I wasn’t interested. Finally, she said “Well?” and sure enough I soon had my dick in her, fucking away. After a minute she stood up before I came and continued getting dressed. “This bitch is getting intolerable!”, I thought. She didn’t even bother to tell me to jerk off, pretending that my dick wasn’t just in her.

It wasn’t long before she got brave enough to just do what she wanted. She told me she and a guy she knew (not the guy from before) were going to fuck that weekend. No more asking me if I was interested. She just said it and walked off. Of course, the guy showed up and they fucked and I watched, horny as ever. This time, however, after the guy left, she lay back on the bed and told me to fuck her and not stop until she said to. So I did. She never did say to stop and I busted a nut in her pussy for the first time in a while. After I did, though, she said, “Don’t get used to that idea.”

A few days later I thought everything might be returning to normal when she said that her friend (one of the girls from before) was coming over that weekend and wanted to hook up. She was lying. What ended up happening was that she and the girl sat on the edge of the bed, fully clothed, and my wife told me I could jerk off for them if I wanted to, but that was the only choice. I tried to decide whether it would be more defiant to do it or to just walk off. I decided to do it. My odd way of saying “Fuck you”, I guess. When I came though, they both laughed and my wife said “That was quick”. which it kind of was.

That was how that all started. If I thought she was “intolerable” before, I didn’t even have a clue. It got much “worse”, depending on how you look at it. Things progressed quite a bit from there.

Anyway, back to my point. My wife and I got into cuckolding in kind of a roundabout way, with me not asking her to cuckold me nor her saying out of the blue that she was going to. One thing led to another and that’s how it happened. Whether that’s the right way or the wrong way, I couldn’t tell you. Some people want to get so very philosophical about the shit and say “Well, first, you should first sit down and have an honest conversation and explicitly lay out the expectations you have…blah blah.” Fuck that. I think it’s much more fun the way we did it. I realize that there are many, many ways to get into cuckolding but like I said at the beginning, there’s my way of doing it.

I had no clue whatsoever that I’d like to watch my wife fuck or act dominant toward me, quite the opposite, but it happened and I love it. For the record, that “dominant” attitude applies to our sex life and nothing else. Everything else is about as normal as any other married couple.

But for those husbands who have gotten the idea that they want their wives to fuck another man in front of them or wives that think they’re going to tell their husbands that’s how it’s going to be, seems sketchy to me. More like a recipe for disaster than for success. But maybe it’ll work. But what do I know about how to do it for the first time? Not much. I can only tell you how I did it and that’s all.

I’m sure people would be interested in hearing in the comments how you and your wife started, if you have.

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9 Comments

  • Reply LL on a a ID:1cyit7azkcmh

    Great story. Ours started in a similar way. Wife and I talked fantasies while drinking. She had some bi fantasies, of course I had FMF fantasies . She set a situation up with a girl she new would go for it we had a fmf threesome, in fact did it two more times with 2 other girls. So when my wife was talking about a guy from work all of the girls liked, I could tell she was interested, so who was I to say no after she gave me an fmf.
    Well she had a birthday party at our house 25 to 30 people she told the guy but he wasn’t sure, I reasssured him I was good with it, they snuck off to the bedroom, it was the most agonizing, exciting nerve racking situation ever, I was the only one that knew what was going on.
    I was hooked got a bit jealous, but made me want her more. Definitely preferred over the FMF

    She continued doing this off and on for the 14 years she had one off and on regular and various other hook ups maybe 7 guys total
    One I set up a blindfold encounter for her where I went to the other room while she hooked up with a stranger she loved it.

    After a 4 year hiatus I want her to keep going but am not pushy , I am waiting for her to find the interest again.

  • Reply Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

    I reread, once again, what you wrote, Just Some Guy, and can find no fault in your thinking.
    Your point of view is very well thought out and clearly stated. Thank you for sharing.
    I hope others also share, as the whole cuck, stag, hotwife vixen, experience is greatly misunderstood by too many people.

  • Reply Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

    Never ever carry money or valuables, or leave it hidden someplace, or with a friend.
    Get a bank account and a debit card. So you don’t get robbed. Prostitutes get robbed a lot.
    Be safe out there. Stay away from pimps and cheap streetwalkers. That is a hard hard hard life.
    They will cheat you, beat you, drug you, rob you. Even sell you to put money into their pocket.

    • Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

      This comment about prostitutes was posted on another place, to another person.
      It has no place accidently being posted here. Ignore it. How this sites computers misplaced it on here is a mystery to me.

  • Reply Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

    Starting off in this way can end up in hotwifing, swinging, a one time sexual thing with one guy, a threesome, a friend visiting with ‘pleasures’ whenever he comes into town. Hot sexual vacations together once a year. A wife who goes ‘out with the girls’ once a week. Friends who have free use of a wife basically every time they come over to visit. Lots and Lots of Options. Something for everybody.

    But every couple that I have known that has used this technique, has enjoyed it. Even when it never got past the sexy bedroom talk stage.

  • Reply Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

    The most common way, I have known, is by the husband or wife playfully talking about how hot so and so looks. What they would be like to flirt with or kiss, or to watch the other one do that. Take the talk into bed with them, make it into a playful sexual fantasy between them. Step by step, slowly turning it into a wondering desire. ‘What if I could”, What if she would’, ‘Could we really do this’.

    Every husband has at least one friend, usually a close friend, who secretly lusts after his wife. Often the wife secretly lusts back. Tiny ideas, hints, fantasies, permissions, can be dropped towards wife and friend perking their interest. Then candid talks. Then permission ‘to see how it goes’ encouraging, not pushing, into flirting, dancing, playfulness, touching, hugs, and finally kisses. Then with Your Approval,,, everything just seems to happen naturally.

    One rule. No sneaking behind hubbys back. That is being unfaithful to the marriage and the friendship, and sneaking almost causes problems.

    • Just Some Guy ID:8bvxdgx4qm

      Yes, I know of one couple that started out like that. I knew all three of them and it was a joke between them that he had a crush on the wife. The husband even jokingly referred to him as “My wife’s boyfriend”. They had never done anything together at that point. The husband told me one time that they had finally done the deed and I asked him how it happened. He said they had been drinking and the wife had jokingly said something along the lines of “You may get to find out what I’m like in bed one day if you’re lucky” and they all laughed. The husband then says “One day? Hell, I think it’d be hot if you two just fucked right here in the living room right now.” To make a long story short, one thing led to another and they actually did while the husband watched them. I asked him if he felt like he had bitten off more than he could chew once he saw they were actually doing it and he said that instead of that, he had never been hornier in his life watching his wife fuck. So obviously, like you said, the wife had had at least a little crush on the guy in return and had hoped for a while that the situation would finally lead to that, and it did.

    • Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

      JSG, Good to hear from you. Your friend and his comments “My wife’s boyfriend” “one day? Hell,,,,,” And the wife saying, ” You may find out,,,,,” are exactly the types of things said in relationships like these. I’m happy to hear that you know people like this. They are fun friends to have, especially as they let you and your wife see into another part of this exciting lifestyle. I wish you and your wife well and I hope that you have many happy adventures together.

  • Reply Cappy ID:1a4kzeo38i

    You explained this extremely well. I have known people in this lifestyle who were very much into dominance and or humiliation. And those who hated it. Everyone is different. The sissy cuck i think, is what most people think of whenever they think of a cuck. I sometimes see that, but not often. More of them are Stags than cucks. That I have known.

    I have known more women who delight in watching how turned on their husbands get by watching her flirt and fuck, and fucking hubby afterwards than any other type of Hotwife. I think that is hot. Turning your husband on so much, that he is hard as steel and will just fuck his fife like crazy after the other man, or men, have gone away. To me, that is just incredibly hot.

    Everyone knows a wife, or more, who cheats behind her husbands back. Some of them have husbands that enjoy that. Most are just cheaters though. Cheaters who do not have willing husbands, are not Hotwives. In my opinion. They just get a thrill of doing something behind the husbands back, sometimes I see them bragging with friends.
    To me, involving your husband, watching his face, as he watches you, must be more thrilling.
    But, we are all different. And that is nice.