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Gateway

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I thought the smokers looked “Cool,” and the first pick-up line I thought of was “Can I have a cigarette?” #Long #Boring #Pros

There was this guy, Glenn. He was in High School, but he came back with a pack of cigarettes to hang out at the middle school. I just held my first butts, as an excuse to hang out, and laugh at their jokes.

Mostly dirty jokes, and I wasn’t always the only girl, but there were a lot more boys, and let’s just say I wasn’t the only one that figured out how to talk to them. So, the other girls pretty much did the same thing. Bumming ciggies, and holding them to act cool, but I didn’t like the taste, and it made me cough when I tried to inhale, so I just blew it out.

My mom hated it when I came home, smelling my fingers to see if I was smoking again, and I told her I was “Just holding it for a friend.” She didn’t believe me, and grounded me, but I still had to go to school, and when I didn’t show up for her to give me a ride home, she knew what I was doing.

She embarrassed me in front of all my friends when she found the smoking circle, and dragged me off by the arm, right in front of them. They all just laughed, but I was seriously grounded after that, she took away everything I could entertain myself with, except for my school books, so all I had to do was my homework, and study so I got my grades up, and she would let me out.

I stopped hanging out after school, just because she knew where the smokers went, and I didn’t want her barging in again when I didn’t take the bus home. So, I started hanging out at the “Bad Girl’s Room.” That was the restroom in a different building, so the Teachers didn’t check on it during lunch, so we could smoke.

We also talked about stuff we didn’t before, when there were boys around, or 7th graders, which we called “Little girls.” Even though they were just 1 year behind us, we were like Seniors, and they were like freshmen. So, they totally wouldn’t understand grown up stuff like sex, and masturbating. That’s where I found out which girls had given up their virginities, and even which one was a slut.

I’m not saying, but she dated a lot of guys, and had sex with them. Then bragged about it to tell us which ones were bad kissers, or “Too grabby.” For even her, because even though she got naked, and put out, they grabbed her tits too hard, and squeezed them so hard they hurt. She finally found “The best one,” but she wouldn’t tell us who he was, so we didn’t try making any moves on him, because he was so great in bed.

Also, he was in High School, so he shouldn’t even hang out at our school, to date the junior high slut. Glenn, but she did tell us he could do oral sex for hours. Meaning he ate her out, but while she talked some middle school boys into trying it (In return for a blowjob) none of them were any good at it, and they blew their wads in her mouth.

Which was fine, she loved cum, and 69ing, so it was something she could do when she didn’t have any rubbers, but she had to finish herself off by hand. I started masturbating, but we all did. We took turns, using the toilet stalls, and listening to her sexploits to get wet, and loosened up to finger out orgasms. We skipped classes after lunch, and my grades dropped again, but I managed to graduate anyway.

That summer, I just walked around, and tried to bum cigarettes, because I was addicted now, but it was hard to get anybody to bum one to a 13 year old. So, I just walked around looking for my nic fix, until I finally saw Glenn hanging out at the gas station. Had a car, and I ran up to him at the pump. He got my name wrong, but I was niccing, and he pointed out the [No Smoking] sign over the pump.

It wasn’t a good idea, even though he never cared about [No Smoking] before, of course the middle school was a Drug Free Zone, but they couldn’t punish it by exploding, and killing us all in a fireball. So, he said he’d “Be right back,” and even gave me a pat on the ass to go in, and buy me my first pack of Marlborough Menthol Ultra-lights.

It turned out he wasn’t in high school, he was 18, and dropped out, but he a car, and money to buy me cigarettes. He offered me a ride, but as soon as we pulled out of the parking lot, I lit up, and got a head-rush. Even though they were Ultra Lights, I was niccing hard, and I struck out all morning. The answer to the “Spare a Cigarette?” was always “How old are you?” and even if I lied, there was no way they would believe I was over 18.

He said he had to “Drop something off,” at an apartment complex, and then he drove me home, but after I told him where I lived, he offered to pick me up the next day. We just drove around all day, not every day, but he had a lot of “Errands” to run, and it didn’t take long before he invited me in to “Party.”

He was a drug dealer, mostly pot, but he could also get a little blow, if you asked him. That’s what he had to drop off, and how he made money without a job, but he rolled up a joint to smoke it with the couple, he was “Parting” with, and they had beers, so they got him drunk, but he just got in the car with me, and drove real slow.

So, we didn’t get in a wreck, or he didn’t get pulled over speeding, and go to jail for driving drunk, underage, with a glove box full of weed, and a 13 year old in the passenger seat. They passed it to me, and told me to “Hold it in,” but I caughed, and they didn’t laugh at me. Glenn joked “You have to cough to get off!” The other guy’s girlfriend offered me a beer, but even though I had drank one or 2 before (I was becoming a bad little party girl, so none of this was new) I figured the pot was enough, for one night.

I’d gotten contact highs before, but I’d never taken a full drag of weed, and tried to hold it in before. So, I wasn’t a little high, I was stoned, and he was drunk too, so he had to pull over. I don’t remember my first time, at all, but he basically just pulled me over behind the steering wheel, and tilted it up. He must have put the seat back down, because I remember how I had to straddle the head rest, in the back seat, but his head was in between my legs, and I guess he ate me out for hours?

Long enough for the pot to wear off, but when I could think again, I started putting things together, so I asked him about his ex. After he gave me a dirty bandana he fished out of the floor boards behind the back seat, to dry my thighs, because he got his spit smeared all over his cheeks, but he just wiped them off on his shirt, and put his seat up.

Oh yeah, and it was this little Honda CRX, so it barely had a back seat, and I was small enough to climb over the seats, with the door open, but he probably couldn’t. So, we couldn’t have sex in the back seat, but if I saw his dick, or touched it, I don’t remember. I was too stoned to remember anything, except for realizing he must have gone out with my “Friend.” The school slut, since she said he could eat you out for hours. He dad all his clothes on, and I just pulled my underwear down to ride his face, but I lost track of time.

It was after dark, and he dropped me off after dark, to get grounded until I turned 18, for being out so late, dressed “Like that.” Well, it was summer, and it was hot, but they let me off for good behavior, when the summer ended, and I started high school, as a freshman.

Glenn wasn’t around (It turns out he got in a wreck, and went to jail for Drunk Driving under-age, and Possession with Intent to Sell, so I didn’t see him again for years.) But I was “Cool,” and his ex failed because she skipped finals to get pregnant, and have a baby, but she took 8th grade over, as a 14 year old mother. (Guess who knocked her up, then dumped her when she got pregnant.)

So, I started dating, but just to use boys for sex. I tried to teach them how to eat pussy, and I got good at blowjobs, but they never really lasted, for hours. I guess I can blame it on bad role-models, and peer pressure, but Glenn ruined me for other guys, just by eating me out, and pretty much got me hooked on oral sex.

So, I went through a “Bisexual” stage, because girls started talking about bi-curiosity, mostly from their boyfriends, and porn. Of course, their boyfriends wanted a bisexual threesome with 2 girls, so they showed them pictures, and movies. Mainstream porn (Late 80s-early 90s) always featured at least one scene, often the last one involved the girls making out, and licking pussies until the men showed up to gang-bang them, but nothing “Gay” like sucking, and buttfucking each other.

The girls of course, buttfucking a girl wasn’t “Gay,” but lesbians, and bisexual girls weren’t either. There was no such thing as bisexual boys, or they were closeted, because if they so much as got a boner in the boy’s room, they were labled “Faggots” until they graduated, or everyone forgot, whichever happened first.

Sorry, a long story short, I met a lesbian in high school, and she was a Junior, but she liked to hang out in the girl’s rooms, and ask freshmen if we ever felt a little bi-curious? I just wanted to be eaten out, and she could do it for hours, she was even better at it than Glenn (From what I could remember) and she had sex toys so we could take turns playing “The boy,” but she wasn’t bisexual at all.

She was a bull dagger, 100% lesbian, and she just talked to bi-curious girls to seduce us when we’re younger. Pretty much exactly like Glenn, only without the drugs, so I could remember the sex, and actually learn how to give oral sex to another girl, so I learned it. She tricked me into thinking I was a lesbian, and made me her girlfriend for a little while.

When she graduated, and moved out, I went to live with her, and get out of my house. I kept smoking, because I was an addict, but I had to hide it from her, pretty much exactly the same as my mom, only we shared a room, and a bed. So, I couldn’t hide a pack, or a lighter from her, but after she came out. She got a mowhawk, and Xes tattooed on the backs of her hands. (That ment “Straight Edge,” because a lot of the punk rock clubs didn’t have stamps for the all ages shows, so they put an X on your hand so the bartender wouldn’t serve you alcohol.) Listening to Minor Threat, and safety pinning a patch she cut out of her teeshirt onto her jeans jacket, stomping around in Army boots until I broke up with her, and moved out.

I thought she changed, when really she just lied to me, then stopped trying to be someone else. I didn’t love her, and after she went Punk Rock, I didn’t even like her any more.

I liked drugs, and partying, which she didn’t like, so she wouldn’t let me, and she started acting too much like my mom, and dad. Also, Cock Blocking just by being my girlfriend, and making me her little lipstick skirt girlfriend.

So, I didn’t actually have sex with a man until after I dropped out of high school, and I couldn’t go to College without my Diploma. I didn’t have a job, and I had no work experience, so they wouldn’t hire me. Finally, I wound up in the shelter for women, and families. For the winter, they only let you stay a month (Unless you’re pregnant, or you had to go to court to get a Restraining Order, or charge your rapist with Rape, and so on.)

Just being young, and homeless wasn’t enough, but it kept me from freezing to death when it was really cold, all January. That’s where I started talking to the prostitutes, since some of them checked into the Shelter for a month, to detox (I could only smoke, they breathylized you when you came in) and save rent through the coldest months. January, and February, but that’s where I learned some of the ins-and-outs of Motel hooking.

First, you had to get some regular Johns, so you could afford to pay the hotel rent, even the weekly rates were pretty expensive, but $100.00 a night was enough not to get kicked out, with a little left over to eat. I was young, and skinny. Even younger looking because of the drugs. Coke was even better than diet pills (Which were basically over the counter speed) so I got plenty of older guys, that wanted to play “Daddy.”

It’s not a great life, so let that be a warning to you, kids. Stay in school, get a job, and Drugs are a great way for guys to get you. Use you up, and throw you out like a cigarette butt. So, don’t depend on meeting a rich guy to marry you, and buy you everything you need. There’s not enough rich guys for all the poor girls with no life skills, or realistic goals.

It’s not a realistic goal, Princess. There’s not enough Prince Charmings to go around, and most of them look like your creepy uncle. So, if you want to get married to a good man, your age, you better start acting like the kind of young lady that a man like that would want to date.

That’s why Sluts, and Whores are almost synonymous. We’re not the same thing, but if you party, and slut it up long enough, it’s only a matter of time before prostitution is the only career option you have left…

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