Date Nut

My momma had a date, but he just kissed her at the door, and said “Good night, sugar.” Went in, and left him there.

“Don’t worry,” I came out from underneath the stairs, but I put out my cigarette when he pulled up. “She ain’t playing hard to get, she just don’t wanna come off as a slut on the first date. Don’t go home with your heart on.”

“You say heart, or hardon?”

“Either or, you ever heard of Leonard Cohen?”

“No,” he didn’t say it Spanish like, or French. I’m not taking either one in school yet, but I got an A in English. 2Bs in my bra cups. “Who is he?”

“Huh?” I looked up. “Oh, just some Jewish Singer.” I giggled, “He had this song called don’t go home with your heart on, it’ll only drive you insane.” My daddy used to listen to him a lot, even if he is Jewish, but the Beasty Boys. They’re Jewish too, and they can rap.

“How old are you?” I backed up around the apartment building, ducking under windows when they got their lights on, but it isn’t that late.

Would you believe, “13?” I nodded, and he stepped through the light, slanting through the blinds before it disappeared again. In blue stripes, like a pack of Newport Stripes. I know, I got an oral fixation, it ain’t gonna kill me quick. “Why?”

“Oh, no reason. You’re just really mature for your age is all.” Hispanic, Latino, so I wonder if that tastes any different. You know, maybe Spicy from all the chilis he eats, is it chiles, or Chilis? I forget which is the peppers, and which is the dish, with meat and beans in it.

“Huh, it’s hot out here.” I pulled off my dress, just as soon as I got in the corner. The darkest corner of the whole apartments, I know of. Can’t even see the lights from the parking lot, and the fence is dark brown, so we can blend in a little.

I can hear a zipper drop, you know what I’m saying? “Huh, my momma doesn’t suck a dick like this. Oom mhn!” Nope, not spicy, just salty. Especially when I got my tongue in his foreskin, and swirled it around. Not even soapy, neither.

“No?”

“Smup! Huh, even better.” I looked up, and he pulled his shirt off over his belly. I don’t mind, if it ain’t too much. A little fat, it doesn’t get in the way, it just bumps my forehead, softly. “Ngh,” don’t gag. “Guh kah!” Just like a hot-dog, try it again. “Wrlgh! Kah! Stpoot!”

“She teach you how to do that?”

“I’m a quick learner, but I heard her. Suckin dick through the door. You gotta earn it, but I bet you if you take her out someplace nice. Not some cheapass dinner, and a movie. A rock concert, she likes to watch the moshpit, so some band heavy enough to have a moshpit.”

“Uh, huh? Don’t stop, faster.”

“Ihihihn!” It winked at me, even in the dark. He’s light skinned, especially in the pants, so I bet it’s even red on the inside. Like a heart on his hardon!

“Oisie!”

“Wahun?” I just pulled out the neck of my top, and tucked it in. “Ihihihihn!” Rubbing it back and forth over my B cups, so it mashes flat, and the hard part dimples in. Spurting out around it, and getting it all over everything in there. “Hah, yeah. Ahhh.” I let it slip out, dangling, and dripping, but I missed the last drops. Trying to catch it on my hands, but I licked my lips.

He zipped up his pants, and turned to run around the corner. With his tail between his legs, I’m not drying to cock block momma. I swear, I’m trying to help you out here, but if you’re not willing to share your man. You don’t want him anyways, if he’s so easy to freak out. Seriously, men need to get over their stupid racist sexist bullshit.

Like, so what if a black woman likes metalheads, with long hair? Headbangers, it don’t have to be Bodycount, or Hirax. It ain’t White music, she’ll be happy if Sepultura opens up for Brujeria or would it be Brujeria opening up for Sepultura? Yeah, I guess they’d be the headliner, but I better go in, and wash all this jizz off, before it drips down, and soaks into my panties to get me pregnant with a mixed race baby.

What’s that gonna look like, in middle school? I mean, I bet it’ll go to my hips, and tits, just like it did to my momma.

“Snh?” Zeke smelled it as soon as I got in our room. “What you been doing?”

“None of your business? Momma’s not the only one that gets hot dates in this house, you know.”

“Well, let me know when you start charging for it.”

“Uh, I ain’t a ho!”

“I know a pimp, he won’t even beat you unless you hold out on him!”

“Uh, get out?”

“No, seriously. You could get 2 hundred dollars for that ass easy.”

“No, get out so I can change? Damn, it. You sicko pervert. Incest fetish child molester pedo.”

“Kids, stop you fighting in there, mamma needs her peace and quiet.”

“You want the light off?”

“Yeah,” I got a bra out, so “I can handle it in the dark.” It’s not the same, though. I wish he’d get the balls to come over on my side of the room, and feel me up in bed, but he ain’t like that. I don’t think he’s gay exactly, he’s just one of those brothers that respects your boundries, even if I don’t want him to.

It won’t be the same with him neither, and I know it. I miss Teddy, but after daddy run off with that white lady, he stopped cumming over to see me, too. I know, it wouldn’t look right if he did. Zeke hates him anyways, and momma. I guess she don’t need the reminder of who she knows him from, but she needs a man. More than I do, let’s be honest.

You just never forget your first dick, I guess. Even if it wasn’t a big black dick, he’s still black, so it ain’t exactly little. “Ugh khuhk! Sptooh!” Catch it, and rub that in. “Oh, Ted! Yeah, you know just how I like it. Uh, hun! Give it to me, Ted. Give it to me good and hard, oh! Oh Ted OHTED!”

My brother knocked. “You finished in there?”

“Huh, yeah.” I curled up, and cuddled my pillow. Clenched my eyes tight when the hall light swung in, and hit my eyes.

“Fuck, man.” He slammed the door.

“Zeke!”

“I’m sorry, but it’s bad enough to hear mom Jilling off in there, now you come home reeking of jizz, and kick me outta my room to call Ted’s name. He didn’t molest you, you’re sure?”

“Huh!” I just rolled over. “No, I told you, it’s just a stupid schoolgirl crush, but I really miss him now.”

“Well, you’re a middleschool girl now, you’re practically a teenager for Christ’s sake, so you better get you a boy your own age, or closer to. I know this boy, he’s a freshman, but I bet he’d ask you out.”

“Oh yeah, I’ll blow him on the first date to seal the deal, what’s his name, what’s he like, is he black?”

“He’s, well. Yeah, he’s black, but not like southern black, or ghetto black. He speaks decent English, but he smokes.”

“Well, okay. You know I don’t like that,” Teddy smokes too. Especially after sex, “But maybe I can make him quit?”

“I don’t know, and I don’t care, but I’ll ask him to come talk to you tomorrow, after school?”

“Yeah, he can get off right by the bus stop. He take your bus?”

“Yeah, but if I can get the car, maybe we can pick you up for a double date.”

“With who?”

“Sasha. You know Sasha?”

“Kosmova? You’re going out with her?”

“Well, yeah.”

“I heard she’s connected.”

“Well, I guess she’s on the cheer squad, and I’m Jr. Varsity, so yeah.”

“No, I mean Russian Mafia connected.”

“Oh, no. She’s not Russian, she’s Kazhakstanian.”

“Muslim? But she’s like, white white. I mean blonde hair, blue eyes, Nazi white.”

“Well yeah. Cossack, white Russian.”

“I thought you said she’s not Russian?”

“No, but when they say Caucasian, or White Russian, that’s what they mean.”

“Oh, GTK!”

“Yeah, apparently the Nazis mistook them for the Tajiks, who’re the real Arayans. That means Persian in Sandskritt.”

“All right, that’s enough you big nerd.”

“You a nerd!” Finally, I got my brother back. My same old brother, yeah we nerds, but if we talk black, then nobody will notice. It’s easier to get picked on by racists than made fun of for being intellectuals by your own kind.

It’s not talking white, Sherese. It’s proper English. Jesus Christ, it’s bad enough without brothers, and sisters playing up the racist’s stereotypes, but I sure hope that fat Latino comes back. Or should I say cums back?

“Hihihn!”

“What’s so funny?”

“I wonder if that dude is Mexican, or some other kinda Latin American?”

“I knew I shouldn’t get you started on Geography. Go to sleep, we got school in the morning.”

“Huh, okay.” I rolled over, and wondered if he’s Argentinian, or Belizian? Definitely not Brazilian with that hairy ass nutsack… “G’night…”

“She won’t even tell us his name until after the second date.”

“Huh! I know that.” Don’t want to get her hopes up. Still, he’s right. I need to keep my grades up, if I’m gonna get out of here, and into a college. Daddy took the trust fund with him when he moved out with that white woman, to make mixed babies with, and she’s already pregnant out to there. So, you know they didn’t wait until after the divorce to start fucking.

Should’ve just been happy with sucking him off. You can’t get pregnant from that. Zeke fell asleep first, so he started snoring.

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