Naughty Onesie

He wouldn’t tell me why he had a onesie designed like a cow and then one day I found out why. He was a perverted genius.

I have always wondered why my best friend has a cow onesie hanging off his wardrobe, I’d asked him about it loads of times but he wouldn’t ever tell me why he had it, onesies were cool years ago but totally out of fashion now, it was black with white patches, it had a hood in the shape of a cows head, fake udders sticking out of the front and a thin tail at the back, no one at our school would be caught dead wearing one unless it was fancy dress or something, fun for little kids but he’s 13 and way too old to be wearing one.

One night I was round at his house, we were playing video games in his room, and I finally found out why he kept the onesie.

“Who’s that?” I asked, hearing girls laughing and shouting downstairs.

He exited the game and put the controller down, “My cousins, Lilah and Lucy.” He said, getting to his feet, he looked excited that they were here and he waited by the door when we heard heavy footsteps coming up the stairs, then Lilah and Lucy burst in to the room and gave him a big cuddle.

They said hi to me and I said hi back, I’d not met them before, it wasn’t every day I saw twin girls, they looked absolutely identical, same hair style, same pink and yellow dresses, they were so much alike with the only way to tell them apart was Lilah had a blue ribbon in her hair and Lucy a red ribbon, they were about 10 years old.

“Want to play ‘Moo-Moo’?” he asked them, they jumped up and down with excitement wanting to play.
I paused the game I was playing and turned around and looked at him like he was a total knob head, “Moo-Moo?” I asked.

“Just watch…” he said, then he took the onesie off his wardrobe, “Right, you get ready and I’ll be back in a minute.” He said to the girls, then he went in to the bathroom.

The girls pulled a box out from under the bed and they took out a green door mat that looked like fake grass and a small metal bucket, they laid the mat out on the floor and put the bucket in the middle of it and just sat either side of it waiting.

When he came back in to the bedroom he was wearing the onesie, he looked like an idiot, “What the fuck are you doing?” I asked, whispering because I didn’t want the girls to hear me swear.

“Just watch.” He replied, then he got on his hands and knees and started crawling around the floor going “Moo!”, the girls chased him around for a minute and then walked him, still on his hands and knees, over to the mat on the floor.

“Time to milk the cow.” Lucy said, enthusiastically, and she and Lilah started pulling on the fake udders underneath him, pretending they were milking a cow.

He indicated over to me as if telling me to pay attention, then I saw it, he’d cut a hole in the middle of the fake udders on the onesie and his cock was sticking out through the hole, “Moo-Moo”, he called out, as his cock stuck out having become fully erect.

The girls, having absolutely no clue that it was his cock, both grabbed hold of it and started to pull and rub it, “Moo-Moo-Moo” he called out.

“I found the hard one. Must be loads of milk in this one.” Said Lilah.

“Yeah, keep pulling.” Said Lucy, positioning the bucket underneath his cock.

He looked over at me, smiled and gave me a thumbs up, I have to admit he had one hell of a scam going, quite genius of him finding a way to get jerked off without the girls even clicking on to it, as far as they were concerned it was a just a game and they honestly believed they were pulling on an udder and not his cock, I guess they’d never seen a cock before.

“Dirty bastard.” I mouthed with my lips, not saying it out loud, he just smiled while enjoying their jerking.

“Moo-Moo…” he called out, a few minutes later he “Mooo’d” really loud and I turned my head away when I saw his come shoot out of his cock and in to the bucket below.

“Anymore?” asked Lucy.

“No. I have no more milk today.” He replied, “Are you going to check if its good?” he asked.

“Yeah…” said Lucy, she and Lilah took turns drinking his come from the bucket, “…No. It’s sour.” She said.

“Your milks gone sour.” Said Lilah, she hit him on the head, “Bad cow.” She said.

That was the most bizarre and yet most genius thing I’d seen in my life, so far, clearly he was a dirty fucker, but I was jealous he got a hand job from not one but TWO girls.

AND THEY DRANK HIS SPUNK!!!

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