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Back 2 School (Spoilers)

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This kinda picks right up, without a recap. So, you should probably read the first part first.

“Little Liar!” I teased her, but really I was just grateful that she showed me how to kiss Ted.

“What? I had to, it’s not my secret to tell, and besides, you know how boys talk.”

I shook my head, “Not Ted.”

“How come you call him Ted, instead of Theo, or something?” She changed the subject.

“I don’t know, it’s not Theodore. His name is Thadeus.” I made a face, and she made one too.

“Ew! Well, I knew you liked him, just as soon as you saw him this morning.” She made another face, like she was excited, and giggled.

“Well, I haven’t seen him in Months, and he’s grown up a lot.”

“If you say so.” She shrugged, “Huh, I thought you liked hunks.”

“Well, I don’t know, he’s nice to look at, but. You know, I don’t really know him?”

“Me neither, but.” She grinned, “You’re right, he is nice to look at.” Nodding.

“So, how long have they been going out?” I tried to change it back.

“Oh, I don’t know.” She pulled out her phone, and tapped the screen, to check the time. “Only about 11 hours. If you don’t count sexting and camming on the internet.”

“Oh, so they met online?”

“Yeah, but I guess it’s just sex. He likes bears.”

“You didn’t tell me he was a furry.” I giggled.

“No, uh!” She laughed, “Not like real bears, or cartoons, nor even Teddy Bears,” she tried to elbow me again. “You know?” I shook my head, “Older guys, with beards, and hairy bellies, like my dad?”

“Ew, why?”

“I don’t know, I’m not a gay man, some of them like that sorta thing is all. Besides, it’s not that weird, my mom loved him too.”

“Oh yeah, about that.”

“What? Let me stop you before you say something like doesn’t that make him bisexual? Because it doesn’t, he’s gay, trust me. 100% full gay.”

“Well, he is your dad, but, how did he even get it up, or. Maybe he beat off in a cup, and they used a turkey baster?” Like a lesbian couple would.

“I don’t know, did your parents give you all the dirty details about how they got pregnant, and had you?”

“Well, no. I mean, huh. You’re right.” Something about waiting until graduation, but they got married right after, and I counted back, from my birthday to their wedding anniversary, because it didn’t add up. 3 months apart, that’s barely long enough to start showing, let alone go through a full pregnancy, in the first trimester? Well, they didn’t wait until the wedding, but that’s all I know. They waited until they graduated high school at least, so they didn’t have to worry about work, school, and taking care of a baby.

Then, the bell ran, so we had to get to class. I switched gears, to finding the classrooms, and getting my books. Learning my teacher’s names, and stuff, but it was easier for me, because I knew my way around from last year.

Caroline just moved here, with her dad. He got a divorce, when his wife caught him with another man, and her brothers got all gross about it, so they didn’t want to move in with him, and she didn’t want to live with them any more since they turned into gay bashing homophobes, and sexist, talking about cuck this, and friendzone that, a fedora, and neckbeard away from full on incels, practically overnight.

“Huh!” Boys, but Teddy’s not like that. I guess, I never heard of bears, in the gay sense, but I barely even know any straight boys, let alone any gay ones, and even if I did, in middle school they’re probably too closeted to talk about it. For fear of the other boys finding out, and gay bashing them.

Maybe if I had a brother, I could talk to. My dad is just as clueless as any other guy in Generation X. At least he’s not a hipster, and he just got a convertable for his midlife crisis, but he has put on, a little weight. He’s not that hairy, but he still looks like my dad, only a little softer around the middle.

Not like Teddy, he’s still young, and skinny, without even a little hair on his face, below the eyebrows. Or lower eyelashes, I guess. I can kinda imagine him getting older, and shaving. Maybe leaving a little 5 o’clock shadow in the morning, but with a hairy gut? Ew no. I don’t know about that, but I guess I’ll wait and see. Maybe my tastes will mature with him, like mom’s, and maybe I should ask her how she feels about dad’s body changing, later.

I guess that’s all I thought about, first period, because the bell rang, and I realized where I was all a sudden. Then, i had to find where I needed to be, but I keep an eye out for him. I’d seen him around the halls, last year, but then he got new classes, and i got new classes. What with one thing and another, i had no idea when, and where I’d see him again, or even if we’re on the same floor, but at least we hadn’t gotten our Locker assignments yet.

“Huh!” I sat down, and caught my breath, but the next teacher waited, and just took our names as we came in. “You sit over here.” She waved to a table, instead of desks. We had 2 tables, facing each other, and her desk in between.


“Anywhere on this side, we just can’t have boys, and girls together, distracting each other with your hormonal.”

A boy came in, so she shut up, and carried her clip board over to get his name. So, I picked the seat on the end, closest to the door, so I could get in, and out the easiest, but I was the first one there. So, I just sat down, and started daydreaming again. About Ted, of course. He’s got to be 13 by now, just like me, though we never got invited over to each other’s birthday parties. I don’t even know what his birthday is, but we were both 5 when we met. In kindergarten, on the playground, and I don’t even remember what he looked like back then, but we grew up together so gradually that he was always just Teddy.

Huh, Teddy Bear, until he started to hate being called that. Because the other kids teased him about it, but Tad, or Thad wasn’t a whole lot better. Last year, when we started middle school, and the teasing stepped up to a whole new level. I hope it doesn’t get even worse next year, in high school, but I’m not going to get there if I spend all day daydreaming, and you know what?

She’s probably wrong about that. Boys, and girls, sitting together, instead of across from each other, because every time you look up, there’s a boy, right in front of you. And you have to keep your legs together, or crossed, even if you wear shorts. I mean yeah, they’re long enough to cover my knees, practically culottes, standing up, but are my knees showing?

I can practically feel the air condition, blowing up the outside of my pant leg, which is cool and all, but that just makes me feel sweatier between my legs, and that just reminds me of his hand on my thigh. His thumb brushing the top of it through the fabric, and then he went to kiss Caroline, and then he turned back, and.

Every time he came back to me, he was a better kisser. “Huh!” Now, I’m blushing, but don’t shake your head, or draw any attention to it, or the boys will notice, and probably think they have the hots for me, but why did we decide to do it in the morning, before school?

Well, Caroline showing off her dad’s boyfriend, or one night sand, or whatever. That sure broke the ice, and I never had any idea how to get a boy to talk to me, let alone make out with me, or us, and I should be jealous of her, but she’s only 12, and it’s kinda hard to believe that. I mean, not really to look at her, but I know plenty of thirteen, and fourteen year olds that look that young, that’s not it.

It’s just that as soon as she opened her mouth, let’s see. We got introductions out of the way, and she told me she was 12, starting 7th grade before, well. I guess I asked why she moved here, and that’s when she told me her dad was gay. Got a divorce, caught with another man, they moved out, but her brothers got all weird about it, and then Teddy showed up.

No, Ted. He’s Ted now, and not a little boy, but. Now, I’m wondering if he’s hairy at all, down there. Trying to shake the sight of that man’s pubes, and his schlong swinging like an elephant with a toupee, and scratching his balls on the way to the bathroom.

“Ms. Schöfield?”

“Huh?” Now everyone is looking at me. The teacher down under the desk, so now all the boys are staring at my legs, too.

“You need to go to the lady’s room?”

“Huh, yeah. That’s it I.” Better take my backpack, with my gym clothes in the outside pocket, and a change of underwear for after P. E.

“Just take this.” she held up a hall pass, “And hurry back.”

“That time of the month,” some boy really should have whispered.


“Uh!” I just rushed out, thankful that I’d taken the closest seat. And got P.E. first semester, instead of Health, and Anatomy. So, at least I had clean dry underwear to change into, after if got a quick cat bath in the sink, and dried between my legs.

“Huh, ooch!” Jeeze Louise, these paper towels are like grocery bags, only rougher. “Huh!” So, I better use toilet paper.

No, it’s not that time of the month, butthead. It’s something different, I never felt before, but I know exactly what it is. I’m horny, I’ve got the hots for Ted, and I got wet!

I actually got wet.


Caroline (FAQs)

Okay, it’s complicated, so at some point, you just have to take notes. My dad is gay, not bisexual, and nothing made him gay. He always was, but he had to hide it for most his life, and he got married to have kids, because back then there was laws about homosexuals adopting, teaching children, or really being around schools if they were convicted of Sodomy, or whatever.

He wasn’t, convicted of Sodomy, and those stupid old “Crimes against Nature” laws were all taken off the books because they weren’t constitutional, and it was kinda stupid once they got to marry each other. “Oh, it’s okay, you can still get married, but we can still arrest you, and register you as a sex offender, if you have sex, with your husband.”

Oh yeah, and the Bill of Rights starts with “Congress shal pass no law respecting an institute of religion…” Right off the bat, that’s literally the first Commandment, but after 200 years or so, Congress found ways around it, of course.

So anyway, that’s enough of a civics lesson, so I guess the next question girls usually ask is “How did you find out?” Well, when my mother caught them kissing each other goodnight, out in the car, she hit the roof, stomped out there, demanded a divorce, and yelled things like the F word. No, not Fuck, the other F word, it’s got 6 letters, and means a homosexual male, only not as nicely?

Yeah, that one, at the top of her lungs. His boyfriend drove off with the door wide open, just as soon as she dragged them out, she kept screaming at him to get out, and she couldn’t stop him coming inside to grab some clothes.

Now, the next thing, my brothers asked each other was if he ever tried to touch them, looked at them funny naked, or whipped it out, and jerked off in front of them, because of course they heard from other boys that homo=child molester. Well, no. Of course not, any more than every straight guy molests his daughter, or looks at her funny, or whips out his pecker to beat off in front of her, because he’s straight.

That’s more of a hormonal teenage boy kinda thing to do. I don’t want to talk about it, okay? It’s just. I know what that feels like, when somebody does something like that to you, can I just leave it at that? No, I’m not trying to protect him, I just don’t want to talk about it. It doesn’t make me feel any better, I feel dirty, and gross, and not sexy at all, okay? I don’t even like to remember it, but yeah. I know what that feels like.

I guess Teddy accusing me of stalking makes sense, it’s my fault for lying. He had a good point, when he asked Holly how she’d feel if that happened to her, and oh yeah. Let me skip back a bit: “Why else would he walk around naked, without any blinds, or curtains, or anything?”

Well, for one thing, it wasn’t his house and he just woke up. For another, we just moved in, in time for me to start school, and we hadn’t finished unpacking anything yet. He didn’t have any blinds, and even if he did take some from mom’s house, they wouldn’t fit because they’re not the same size. So, I made a note to pressure dad into taking me out shopping for stuff to put up over the windows. So, I don’t have to change in the bathroom, and keep the lights off until I put a bathrobe on over my underwear when I wake up.

“Huh!” I know, it’s a lot, and it’s all mixed up, but bare with me. Honestly, writing it all down and organizing it helps me think it through even better.

Let’s see now. I hope dad isn’t serious about that guy. I mean yeah, he’s super hot, hung, and muscular, but he’s also vain, and more than a little bit of a douchebag about it. I hope dad can look past his rugged neatly trimmed stubble, hairy chest, rippling abs, tight tush, and 9 inches of circumcised…

“Huh!” Okay, it’s a good thing he’s gay, AND he’s not into little girls, my age. I’ll get bigger, but if he ever even took one look at me, I don’t know if I could say no to those big brown eyes, surprisingly soft handshake, and hot bod. If he kept his mouth shut, but that voice. Uh! It’s almost sexist, the way he tries to sound girly, act girly, and talk to me about hair product, like I care about hair product, I’m 12? I sure as hell don’t have any interest in cutting my bangs, and spiking them up to show off my hair line, and i think he might even shave it into that widow’s peak to look more like Karl Urban.

Besides, it would be weird if they got married, I had to call him dad, and have him calling my dad “daddy,” and.I don’t know how I would feel about listening to them, you know. Fucking? Taking turns being the bottom, and the way he squealed only not muffled through the window like they were last night. All last night, it seemed like forever.

“Why don’t you go out?” He said. “Make some friends?” So they could be alone.

So, I waited in the back yard, until they moved to the bedroom. And a little longer, so I could see dad take off his shirt, and rub his muscles, and kissing, and feeling the stubble on his chin. His knuckles brushing over the rippling abs to his belt, and button, and zipper, and then.

“Huh!” I don’t know. 9 inches. I know, that’s the kinda thing guys brag about, and I thought he might be exaggerating, but no. I believed it, just as soon as I saw it. Maybe gay guys are smart, and don’t promise what they can’t deliver, because they can trust another man to know what 9 inches actually looks like.

After all, I’m just a stupid little girl, right? A boy can tell me 4 inches is 7, and I won’t be able to tell the difference. Well, no. Bullshit, so don’t even try it. I might be young, but I’m not stupid.

I didn’t know my dad was such a size queen, though. I guess we never really talked about it. I mean, how do you ask your dad what kinds of guys he likes? That would be awkward, to say the least. Still, good to know, I guess. I can see what he sees in him, but god. What a douchey asshole!

LOL maybe you call them an Enema, instead of a Douche, if they’re gay. You get it?



I’m sorry, but it’s not just a long story. It’s 3 characters, trying to understand their own stories well enough to tell them to each other, and I barely got through the introductions. So, bare with me…

Also, Bear/Bare, There/Their/They’re… 7th, and 8th grade English, and they are probably going to start letting their grades slip, from being distracted by hormones, puberty, and sex. It’s confusing for them, so it’s going to be confusing for you, too.

Put away the red pens, professors.

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